i have the power to show you what i want you to see. of me. of myself of us of my life of our differences and similarities are just parodies of things i think might possibly be true. but i know they are—looking at me and what they see is what i can’t—really hide what i think is ugly of myself. most of the time i don’t catch it unless it’s through someone else’s eyes. and even then i get used to the blur, the deafening purr of overheating—im retreating into my own mind behind my body is liberating. what im creating is ice that keeps its shape in the microwave. identity that spits in the wind only to be baptized by its own saliva. just hit customize appearance. strong and weak, powerful and oppressed—why do i have to choose? my emotions are news—worthy so i publish them myself. and if you can read them—you’re on the inside of my life and the outside of my world. what does it mean to be gritty? but it doesn’t matter. because you think im pretty. and ugly is something you learn.
April 20, 2012
ugly is something you learn